The Incoherent Babble of a Technomancer

My dog - my best friend - isn’t doing so well. The nosebleeds that she had sporadically over the last few months are still being caused by a yet-unknown something in her nasal cavity. I’d taken her to a number of vets, but none had yet been willing or able to give me an action plan going forward and none were convinced it was Urgent, and as it had yet to actually bother her I’d been putting it off to focus on moving and getting a job and whatnot. Whatever it is got worse earlier this week, and I rushed her to the ER thinking it might be the end - she could barely open that eye, was drooling heavily, and was just swaying in place at times. The doctor initially said it was likely a tumor (or a stroke?!) and that I probably only had 6 months on the outside, but later rescinded her initial thoughts as Lita improved rapidly after 24 hours of rest and pain meds and suggested we do a rhinoscopy/CT-Scan/Xray. We did that on Thursday, and we are now waiting for the results of those and the biopsies she took while up Lita’s nose. The vet didn’t see a physical object or obstruction, but also didn’t see a lot in the way of blatant tumors/cancer or aggressive bone destruction that they would cause. It is likely that it IS a tumor, however, or some other form of cancer like a sarcoma of the blood vessels or something.

As it stands, I’ve more than doubled in the last 96 hours what I’ve spent since moving (and IN moving) up here. I’m in the hole almost $6000, and as we still don’t even know what’s wrong yet I will likely be closer to 10k before I even know what’s WRONG, much less how to treat it. I’m aware - painfully aware - that there’s an equation to consider, here: if it IS treatable, I still need to balance that against the quality of the life she’ll have and the quantity that will result over leaving it untreated. My biggest fear is not that she’s dying - we all are, afterall, as Life is itself Terminal, - but that it will be treatable and worth years of happy existence and that I won’t be able to afford to help her. To that end, I’ve started cataloging what I can sell of my possessions - if it IS cancer and it IS worth it, I’m looking to spend roughly a car. A nice car. Like the car I’m now considering selling.

As Lita is beloved by many and the most important thing in the world to me, I’ve also setup a PayPal, ChipIn, and am providing folks with a physical address (cause Paypal takes 3% and is evil and I only signed up for it because Lita is my everything) if they’d be willing to contribute anything to her medical bills. I recognize that times are tough and that if you can’t kick in, that’s fine. If you are willing, however, we’d both much appreciate it. Likewise, the ChipIn page (to say nothing of her facebook, my facebook, emails, etc) will continue to be updated regardless of what happens.

PayPal associated with this email address.

I need help, even if it’s just to keep my distracted so that I don’t spend another night sobbing in the ER’s bathroom. I’ve setup this ChipIn so as to help me find ways and the means to help keep her happy, healthy, and in my life.

I can’t lose my dog.

Thank you, all, for your time and consideration. Also - get pet insurance if you’ve got a pet. TODAY.